Archive for October 21, 2008

When i gained the title of second bestfriend..

i’m pissed… and upset.. and disappointed.. and i’m FRUSTRATED!!!

a few minutes ago, i was talking to you… i know you’ve already changed your priorities ever since you got her.. i know i’ve said this to you a countless times.. “the best friend should become the second best friend”… gawd, i got that quote from Gossip Girl… and i kept on telling that to you so she’d feel special… hahaha.. so i know what i should do… i know my limits and your expectations of me.. but i didn’t know that it would feel this way when you actually said that to me..

well, yeah.. of course it came to me as a surprise when you suddenly asked if we could talk about a serious matter… and i kinda know where the talk would lead us… but i just let you talk and see how it goes… haha.. and surprise! surprise! i didn’t know hearing those words from you really put me to shame.. i know i kept nagging and asking you to show yourself to me.. but of course, that’s all because i miss my bestfriend.. i can’t express that now? *sigh* okay..

bottom line: i’m hurt.. i expected this anyway.. having a special someone really requires you to adjust to certain things which also means that i have to adjust with you too.. no more small talks.. no more last-minute gimmicks.. no more “me just dragging you along”.. no more kulitan.. no more late night calls which lasts for hours! yeah.. i’m gonna miss that..

well, i’m sure gonna miss a lot of things from now on… but above all of this, you’re still my bestfriend.. i want you to be happy.. (*eh? i sound like a mother T__T*) and whatever your decisions are, i’m gonna support you all the way.. and when you have problems, i’m still gonna be here.. haha.. i won’t throw our years of friendship away.. don’t worry..

but of course, i need some time to redigest things and adjust.. i have to condition this poor brain of mine to your liking.. haha.. isn’t it too hard to have a bestfriend like me who is such a drama queen??? *hahaha* but yeah.. we have a scripted tampuhan starting now which will last for a week.. so i won’t talk to you.. haha.. so that the next time we meet, i won’t be too clingy anymore..

you won’t be around forever.. so i need to be independent and stop relying on you too much.. haha.. but i promise that after this week long “tampo”, i’d be back to my normal self with adjustments included.. haha.. so let me be angry/mad right now… haha.. but you know i can’t stay mad at you for too long.. T___T

P.S. i don’t hate her.. and i’m not mad at her.. haha… where did you get such an idea??? she’s my friend! haha..

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